Interesting phenomenon...

I have noticed an interesting phenomenon. Humans are so uncomfortable with other people's pain, that they act like it doesn't exist. So, my question is, is it worse to ignore it and perhaps hope that the person in pain moves on? Or to acknowledge the pain and at least try to help or be sympathetic. Have we become a society so wrapped up in our own issues that we can no longer even see others for what they are or what they need?

I have a friend from high school whose brother just committed suicide. We were not close friends in high school but through modern technology (Facebook) we have reconnected. Her pain is terrible. I can only imagine what his 3 kids are going through. Anyway, in order to for someone to actually commit suicide, the pain must be so unbearable that death is preferrable. I have been there. I have felt that kind of pain. While I not currently suicidal, thank God, I also remember feeling really embarrassed by my pain. Why is asking for help so difficult? Why are we embarrassed by other people's pain? Is it that we feel helpless to change things? I would hate to think it is because we just don't care. But do we? Really?

It is curious that since I have been going through this very difficult time, it continually surprises me the people I hear from in support and the people I don't. I tend to think the people I don't hear from are either very uncomfortable with my pain or think I am being a whiny pain in the ass who just needs to shut up. Perhaps both.

I had a friend once who went through similar infertility issues that I did. She had fertility treatments which resulted in 2 beautiful children. I did not. Once her children were born she totally lost the ability to empathize with my struggle. She would talk on and on about her kids while completely missing that I was about to burst into tears. This was a VERY good friend. Are we THAT self-absorbed as a culture to just routinely dismiss others? I am sure I am guilty of obliviousness at times. Surely it isn't intentional. Is it? I need to do better, we all do...