Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy
with Him Forever in the next.
Amen.

I think about this prayer a lot these days. Not just about the adoption but about my life. Handling an anxious, high energy, always challenging child literally zaps me of my strength. Grace is a a constant challenge, every day. In good ways and bad. She challenges me because she is so smart, because she never misses anything but alway because the world MUST be according to her rules. She will badger me until I want to scream. Sometimes I do scream. I think she would have been better off with a sibling. I wish I had done so many things differently. To give her a better life, a better mother. I never think I am good enough but sometimes I lack the energy to change.

Isn't the definition of insanity to do the same things over and over and expect a different result? I live in that world.